2.6.2009
A PERFECT BANK-ROBBERY
http://www.netsaga.is/media/files/Boogaloo.mp3
A PERFECT BANK-ROBBERY
The Savings Bank in Keflavik, which was founded in 1907 used to be the town´s only financial establishment for a long time and had only been in two places until it started business on the Sudurgata nr. 6. Into the new building, which happens to be very elegant the bank had moved on June 17 1955, which happens to be the day of Jon´s birth. When this story´s hero is compelled to go get his first job a few more banks have been founded in the territory; Útvegsbanki (fisheries-) , Verslunarbanki (commerce-), Samvinnubanki (co-op-) and Landsbanki (national-), but still The Savings Bank is by far the biggest in town.
Whilst he collects enough courage for the task he´s going to undertake, he strolls into the town´s Flower-Garden, in which the vegetation has already started to get a few of the summer´s colours now in March, which gives high hopes for a great summer ahead.
Jon contemplates this large rusty-red colored house, which looks two storey seen from there, but only one from the frontside on the Sudurgata.
On the groundfloor one finds the book-keepers, the staff´s facilities and the coffeeroom, but on the middle floor the passenger hall, which most customers visit coming straight in from the street, either to deposit money, draw out or pay bills.
This first bankrobber in Keflavik is of course not aware of this irony of destiny, that he and this building are exactly of the same age, when he puts his hand on the handle of the big teac door up front and walks in from the delicate spring-weather.
To his right there´s a round-staircase which leads up to the top floor, but because he hasn´t the slightest idea where his future victim is located he takes a left turn and enters the passenger hall.
By the counter which forms a corner in the middle of the room stands an extremely fat and lightly dressed middle-aged woman Jon estimates, but he doesn´t give her any attention, but takes a position by her side, greets the accoundant, a pretty girl, who he remembers right away from being in his class back in primary school.
-Well, how do you do Nonni, she greets him in a very good mood, been a long time. Where have you been keeping you?
Jon is puzzled with her address, his anger boiling inside him. Doesn´t she know my name´s Jon, and nothing but Jon, but in stead of scolding her he puts a strain on himself and answers her greetingly in quite a friendly way.
-Hi Odda. I happen to be working on some cases concerning the whole mankind, supposing to have told her enough to be rid of the unnecessary chatting, but his wish isn´t granted this time, for automatically he´s aroused the connatural curiosity of his former schoolsister.
-What do you mean, Nonni, she carries on.
The bankrobber-to-be is getting angrier every second, but yet again he surprices himself by keeping his hat on and eventhough he´s able to detect a tiny tremble in his own voice, the employee doesn´t seem to find anything peculiar, when he answers her.
-I´d really like to tell you more about my cases, Odda dear, but it´ll have to wait until later and a better moment, than now.
Oddny gives a sideglance towards the gigantic woman standing with her legs apart by his side, but is turned away, thus making him unable to see her face, just her black entangled hair on her backside.
She writes some message on a deposit-note and pushes it under the glass.
Jón reads: "She´s a little strange this one!"
"Why´s that? He writes and returns it."
"She appeared there all of a sudden by the counter, just before you arrived and has been standing there like this not saying a word. She´s only wearing a girdle!"
"What do you want me to do, chuck her out?"
"Couldn´t you just say hello to her or something? You know how shy I am."
-OK, Jon says just to free himself quickly, he turns to the fat one and bids her good morning at the same time he touches lightly her shoulder.
He pulls his hand sharply back, when nothing but air seems to be where the shoulder´s supposed to be. His mind works at overdrive, adds two to two and recalls where he´s seen this woman before. This is the holograph of the fat woman he´d once sent unintentionally into the Nonni&Bubbi store.
The Beings had told him that nothing gets wasted really, but instead everything gets transported between phases or domains. Can it be that I´ve been playing too much with the holograhs, thus making them follow me wherever I go? The Beings have often told me to be careful in my experiences with the supernatural. Without any more speculation about this grave problem he returns to the pretty countergirl.
-You don´t have to worry about her, supposedly she´s both retarded and deaf, not able to hurt a fly. Well do you have time for my question now?
-Be my guest, Nonni dear.
-Can you tell me Odda, where I might find the bank´s boss?
-The Savingsbankmanager? There´re two of them now and are both to be found upstairs. Why do you want to see them, if I may ask? The connatural feeling is just about killing her.
-Yes. of course my girl, Jón replies and puts up the important look he feels appropriate to the occasion. I have namely received the message that there´s a good job waiting here for me.
The girl´s obviously amazed hearing his reply, because she had been told , that there wasn´t any need for new employees. That was the answer she received each time she tried to find Solla, her friend a job. Eventhough she´d finished two years of junior college. That´s a lot more education than this good-for-nothing fellow had done. That was something all the towners knew for a fact, for the town´s famous for its gossip.
-I had the perception that we were overstaffed, and her voice has become higher unintentionally, by the way the employment manager, Maggi Halla does all the hiring, but not the bankmanagers.
-I know nothing about that. I just know that I´m supposed to meet the boss, he informs her before he leaves the passenger hall and walks towards the circular stairs.
The astonished young woman follows him with her eyes, but what astonishes her even more is the strange woman, who hovers close behind him in her blubber.
From where Jon´s standing on the highest floor, which has a grey-streaked plastic covering he takes a look around the small hall. There´s a counter with a vertical glass, just like downstairs, but straight.
Working inside are a few people, whom he recognizes from his schooldays, amongst them is Hjortur a son of the town´s head gardener Grasa-Leifi, and Petra, who lives as a matter of fact with her parents at Haholt (high hill)-street. All the employees look up when he approaches the counter, eager to please the potential customer, but when he opens his mouth by asking where he might find the bosses everybody´s eyes stroll towards the monster that follows him like his shadow.
-There inside, Hjortur informs him, while pointing to his right side, not losing his sight off the eyes´ luxury that Jon´s shadow seems to be.
-Thank you, Hjossi, Jon says feeling happy and pleased looking forward to his first tackle on his long road of gathering more influence in a world of people, whom he thinks despicable and inferior to himself.
But how might I gain advantage having the hag at my side? When he speculates which way the interview might evolve when he would be trying to get his victim´s attention, if she would follow him inside. He decides to try and send her some quiet orders in a weak hope it´ll work.
Jon looks at the monster and touches his temples
with all fingers.
-Wait here, and surprisingly it really works.
Jon enters a room, where yet another former school-sister of his welcomes him from behind an elegant desk. He recalls this exceptionally beautiful girl being his neighbour in the same street.
He has often followed her with his adoring eyes, where she´s been swiveling her hips in their street, flinging her shoulderlong black and shining hair.
He´s tonguetied now when he stands infront of the girl of his dreams. Yes how often has he not dreamt about this girl.
-How do you do, dear Jon, and her wonderful voice trembles down his spine. How can I assist you?
He realizes that he hasn´t had the gut to speak to her since they were in primary school, when she along with a whole group of girls, incl. Sigrun, the sister of the famous musicians Maggi and Finnbogi Kjartans had chased him in the Flower-Garden.
When they finally did catch him by the pond, where he fell down exhausted they had smacked their baby-lips on his face.
At that age he didn´t appreciate them kisses and when he´d dried the saliva disgustingly with his hand, they´d laughed their hearts out.
Everyone, but this one who just now had addressed him with this trembling influence. Then Jon was quite sure that she´d enjoyed kissing him more than the others. From then on he´d kept her in his dreams.
How would she react if I told her my story, would she want to support and stand by my side in my quest? No! It´s not timely yet and he shakes off these disillutions.
-Yes how are you, Gudny and thank you for our last meeting relating to the adventure in the Flowergarden twelve years before, but she just gives him a dull face with her blue eyes. But before she returns the greeting he asks whether he might see the bankboss.
-The Saving-bank-manager! Who would you like to see?
-I don´t really mind.
-Please have a seat on the bench, dear Jon. You´ll be next.
Just when Jon sits his ass down on the brown upholstered bench the right door opens and out steps a supple man with thin hair, wearing a black jacket and stone-grey big terline-trousers.
When he strolls by the young man on the bench and leaves the receptionroom he puts up his oldlooking grey-checkered six-pence hat.
They greet each other Jon and Oli Ingibers who became famous, when for decades he transported goods in his truck between Reykjavík, the capital and Keflavík on the old gravel road.
A number of boys got a chance to sit in the superstructure-back of his truck if they promised to help carry the goods into the various stores.
Best of all was to get a lift to the capital in the front beside him, because then it didn´t fail that Oli gave them a dumpling from the bakery in Hafnarfjordur. Even a whole krona at the end of the workingday.
Oli really enjoyed giving people a lift to Reykjavik by the long, dusty and tiresome road, usually quite pitted. Then he told various stories nonstop, being such a fine storyteller. Jon remembers one story about how he met his future wife:
Once upon a time when Oli drove a truck for a
fishfactory in Keflavik, news came about a godsend, a whale that had drifted ashore out on Gardskaga (small peninsula) and Loki got the honours of fetching the carcass.
Having arrived in the small village of Gardur
(stone-fence) he knocked on the door of a small farmhouse called Gardhus.
A young and pretty lass answered his knock-knocks. She told him that she´d escort him to the carcass, as she truly did.
The girl, who´s name was Marta charmed the young truckdriver in such a way, that he decided to ask her for a date.
As it happened in a while they got married to each other and were later blessed with eight promising sons and two daughters, who all have become good and trustworthy citizens.
In the track of this former truckdriver, who had had various honours in his life, including man of the year in Keflavik, when he pulled up the Icelandic banner in the Flowergarden on the national holiday 17. of June, follows a short and vigorish, middleaged man.
-Jon Jonsson is next, Gudny announces with her silksoft voice and they shake hands vigorishly greeting each other.
Jon sits down and for a while his eyes follow the noble manager stroll around the room with his hands behind his back, just like the well known author Thorbergur Thordarson used to do.
-Well, what can I do for you, young friend? His officious voice fills out the room and Jon begins to doubt a little about the prominence of his idea, because the manager seems to be rough to tackle. Will all his plans go astray? No that may not be the case. He decides to use all his wisdom to make the restless boss take his seat.
-Yes my problem Mr. Savingsbank-manager is that I need your help solving a small financial problem of mine.
-Yes just what I thought and for the solving of such problems the Savingsbank was founded. But first I must inform you, that I gotta have some information about you; do you f.ex.have any mortgage, are you employed and where do you live, to start with.
-Ha mortgage? What´s that, Jon asks and realizes that now ´s the right moment to trick him into the opposite seat. What does mortgage mean? Has it some connection with the Lottery, perhabs?
And what do you know.
The Savingsbankmanager shakes his noble head and sits down.
Now´s the moment, goes through the prospective bankrobber´s very pleased mind. Now I must make him look into my eyes, and Jón looks nonstop on the victim´s noble face.
-In brief, he begins like a teacher, who´s educating his pupil, you can say that a mortgage is a pledge on a loan´s repayment. Still the savingsbankmanager keeps from looking into the adolescent´s eyes.
-What do you mean by pledge, Jon inquires with a soft voice. And now for the first time the manager looks fatherly into the innocentlooking eyes of the potential customer, obviously finding his ignorance quite intolerable.
BINGO, quietly says the boy, who´s aim is to become so very powerful, just when he locks the victim´s eyes in his own and starts the hypnotism.
Before long the powerful Savingsbankmanager has become a useful tool in Jon´s hands.
-Will you as a Saving-bank-manager see to that the Savingsbank in Keflavík will pay in on my Savings-bank-book nr. 1481 in the beginning of each month, just like I were an employee here, and now he has to restrain himself by deciding an amount which doesn´t look too suspicious, eventhough it´s awfully tempting to be on a manager´s salary.
On good wages, let´s say a hundred thousand.
-Of course, sir, replies the Savingsbankmanager who hasn´t any will anymore, but who still keeps his dignity, especially fine looking.
-And if someone starts asking questions about these monthly payments, then you´ll tell the suspicious one, that Jon Jonsson is on a secretive assignment, which will be involuable for the Sav-ingsbank in the endless battle for more customers.
-Anything else, sir the hypnotized Savingsbankmanager agrees.
-When our discussion´s concluded you´ll see to that my payment goes into my bank account, thus making me able to draw out right away from my account.
-When I´ll snap my fingers you´ll wake up instantly not remembering anything from this meeting, except that you´re to pay the new employee´s salary on his bankbook each month from now on.
Jon snaps fingers just as weakly as expected from his nonathletic weakling´s body, but it´s just enough to return the Savingsbankmanager to his good old self, and for he´s such an efficient person he stands up right away in the way that´s appropriate to his athletic body reaches out for the
grey buttonphone, pushes a button and gives the instruction that a payment of kroner 100,000 shall be paid into account-number 1481, which is in the posession of Jon Jonsson and shall be the case monthly definately.